Anti-Matter Gun

Anti-Matter Gun

Are you sick and tired of your annoying neighbors? *wink, wink* Or are you sick and tired of their annoying dog? *wink, wink*

 Well, the other day, Tony and I (Trenten) came up with a brilliant idea how to fix these problems, and more. It is called the Anti-Matter Gun. Since there is no object on earth that can withstand anti-matter, it would technically be impossible to make an anti-matter gun. However, there is a better approach.

Although I do not believe this would ever work, nor do I believe in it, the only way to create an anti-matter gun, would be to evolve ourselves into being one. Now, it would not be our whole body, just your hand (right or left, you may choose). Your hand would be the anti-matter gun/anti-matter bullet. You would be able to launch your hand off your arm, and shoot it at whatever object you want. There are many aspects into “evolving” into an anti-matter gun.

First, in order to support your anti-matter hand, you would need an arm that can withstand anti-matter. Therefore, the first step would be to evolve your arm into an anti-matter-proof substance.

In the next phase of “evolution” you would need to learn how to re-grow your hand whenever you wanted, so that when you shoot it, you could grow another, and shoot that one as well.

The third, and final step, would be to turn your hand into anti-matter. This would be one of the harder steps (along with making your arm an anti-matter-proof substance). Once this is all complete, you have your very own anti-matter gun. You can speed this process up by cutting off your right hand while singing, “Mary had a little lamb”.

Things you can use your anti-matter gun for:

-Get rid of an annoying neighbor

-Get rid of the annoying neighbor’s annoying dog

-Get rid of the annoying neighbor’s annoying dog’s annoying veterinarian

-Destroying a bank vault, where all the money is kept (cha-ching)

-Getting rid of boredom, by destroying everything in sight

-Destroying cars in your way, when on a high-speed chase

-Stop your professor from droning on about stuff you don’t care about

-Take your dry cleaner “to the cleaner’s”

-Make a scuba diver “sleep with the fishes”

-“Ice” a snowman

-“Burn” a fireman

-“Clip” your hair-dresser

-“Hit” a boxer

-“Whack”-a-mole

“…antimatter…will…be…responsible for the…unprecedented…violation of this…universe”!  -Casey Kazan

And many more. Just think of all the possibilities.

*When someone has been anti-matterized, they go to the anti-matter universe where everything is opposite, and they hand-feed unicorns. Forever. Unless they "evolve" into having a matter arm, and laser someone into being.

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