The Biography of Haam

 At the moment, I am sitting in a dimly lit room all by myself, having the time of my life...

First of all, this biography may be short compared to all the other biographies you have read throughout your life, but you're just going to have to deal with it. You may also be wondering who Haam is. To help you better understand the biography, I will tell you that Haam is the locker of Max and I. Haam is a very loyal friend, who loves us dearly, which can be proved hence a love note in our locker (from Haam).

The Biography...


The Beginning:
Haam was born in the early 200s, near present day Italy. Haam lived in Italy for his whole childhood, but then later moved on to better and more important things. Haam's childhood only lasted for a mere 20 years, when Haam's parents kicked Haam out of the clan to live on Haam's own.

Family Information:

(All the information you need for Haam's family is in the above picture).

Lifetime Accomplishments:
Haam in known as the most accomplished locker in all of history. In fact, if Haam were a person, Haam would be considered the most accomplished human to ever live. This may seem like an exaggeration, but it's not. Trust me.
Haam has survived many of the world's difficulties including Black Death, helping to found Rome, Discovering the New World, and Inventing the Internet.

Important Events:


Black Death: In 1348, Haam was experimenting with strange chemicals for a science project Haam was working on. During the testing, Haam accidentally spilled some of the chemicals all over the ground. Haam tried to wipe up the mess before it was too late, however Haam was too late. The chemicals created a new bacteria which had spread miles within the first few seconds of being dropped. Haam was devastated that it would cause something this horrible. This bacteria then spread across most of Europe killing millions of people. Haam was afraid that Haam would be found out and put in prison for the rest of Haam's life. So Haam went into hiding for over a hundred years, waiting for Haam's time to be able to escape from Europe forever.

Discovering the New World: in 1492, nearly 150 years after creating the Black Death, Haam figured out how Haam could escape. Haam would help Christopher Columbus search for the New World. However, Chris didn't want Haam to come along, because he only wanted humans that were able to help. Sadly, Haam is a locker. So Haam decided to sneak on the ship in the middle of the night, so no one would ever know Haam was on the ship when it left the dock. The night before the ship left, Haam was able to sneak onto the ship. No one ever knew Haam had done this, until 2 days before they found the New World. When everyone had found Haam out, they were going to shove him overboard. However, Haam screamed as loud as Haam could, and pointed in a direction. Everyone wanted to know where Haam was pointed to, and looked the other way. To their surprise, Haam had found the New World.

Inventing the Internet: This is one of Haam's better work. One weekend, Haam was sitting in its basement all alone, because no one wanted to hang out with Haam. Haam got so bored that Haam decided to play with some cords and other electrical things like that. After 10 minutes of messing around and connecting wires to random things, Haam had created something. To Haam's surprise, Haam had created one of the greatest things known to man... the internet! At first Haam didn't know quite what to do. Haam first kept it a secret, then realized there wasn't really any point in that. So Haam told the world about Haam's discovery, and became very famous. To this day, people still use the internet. Big surprise, I know.

Founding Rome: While creating the internet, Haam also created a time machine. Haam decided to try out this time machine, and went back to 758 B.C. just for the fun of it. Little did Haam know, that this was the date when Rome was being founded. However, the founders weren't quite sure how to build Rome. With Haam's amazing brain, Haam created a blue print for the whole city and gave it to the builders. The builders used Haam's idea, and created Rome, which became a powerful city later on, thanks to Haam giving them the blue prints, and telling them how to run the government.


There you go. That's the biography of Haam, the greatest locker in the world.

Thanks to Alyssa for coming up with the brilliant idea for this post.